Ever catch yourself writing a message that starts simple… and suddenly it’s five paragraphs long? Yeah, we’ve all been there. One second you're just updating a teammate, and the next you’re diving into a detailed backstory that no one asked for.
You’re not trying to be confusing—you’re trying to be helpful, thoughtful, maybe even polite. But here’s the thing: in a fast-paced workday, too many words can actually make things murkier. People skim. People miss the point. And suddenly, you're answering follow-ups on something you thought you already explained.
So let’s talk about how to stop overexplaining, say what you mean, and sound confident doing it.
1. Get Clear on What You Actually Need to Say
Before you start typing, ask yourself: What’s the one thing I want them to know or do?
If you can’t sum it up in one sentence, pause. Jot it down. Simplify it in your own head before sending it out.
Instead of:
“Hey, just wanted to follow up on the marketing draft you shared last week. I was looking at the section on page 3, and I had some thoughts, especially after the meeting with the client...”
Try:
“Hey—can you update the client quote on page 3 by end of day? Thanks!”
Short. Friendly. Clear.
2. Ditch the Guilt-Ridden Preamble
We tend to overexplain when we feel like we're bothering someone. So we add a bunch of apologies, caveats, and explanations to soften the ask.
Like:
“Sorry to bug you, I know you’re probably slammed, but I just wanted to check if maybe you’ve had time to look at the doc from yesterday—totally no rush if not!”
Whew. That’s a lot.
Instead:
“Hey, quick check—had a chance to review the doc from yesterday yet? No rush if not, just keeping an eye on timelines.”
Still nice. Still polite. But now they actually know what you're asking.
3. Stop Narrating Your Internal Monologue
If you’re thinking out loud in a message, chances are you’re overexplaining.
Example:
“I was thinking maybe we try this new workflow, though I’m not sure if it’ll scale, but if it does, it might save time—though maybe not right away...”
It’s honest, but also exhausting to read.
Clean it up:
“Thinking about testing a new workflow—it might help save time long-term. Want to give it a shot and review next week?”
Clarity doesn’t mean losing nuance—it just means packaging it better.
4. Let Structure Do the Heavy Lifting
When you ramble, people miss the point. But when you break things into clean lines, suddenly it’s easy to follow.
Try:
- Bullet points for to-dos
- Numbered steps for instructions
- One-liner intros to set context
Like:
“Here’s what I need from you:
- Approve the revised headline
- Double-check the link in paragraph 3
- Confirm if we’re still good to publish Thursday”
No guessing. No fluff. Just action.
5. Trust People to Ask Questions
You don’t need to explain everything up front.
Seriously. If someone’s confused, they’ll ask. If they need more info, they’ll ping you.
Instead of writing a novel just in case someone might not understand, give the key info and leave room for a follow-up.
This saves everyone time—including you.
6. You Can Be Direct and Still Be Nice
Some folks overexplain because they think short = mean. Not true.
You can be direct and warm. It’s all about tone.
Instead of:
“Hey, sorry again, I just wanted to double check if maybe you’d be okay looking at this today—if not, no worries at all!”
Try:
“Hey! Could you take a look at this today? Totally fine if not—just trying to wrap things up.”
See? Chill and clear.
7. Get Comfortable Hitting Send Sooner
Let’s be real: overexplaining is often just procrastination in disguise. You’re nervous about how it’ll land, so you keep rewriting. Adding more context. Smoothing the edges.
Eventually, you’ve written something even you don’t want to read.
Next time? Write it. Trim it. Send it.
Confidence builds with practice.
8. Have a Few Go-To Templates
Not everything needs to be written from scratch. If you often send similar updates—reminders, check-ins, handoffs—create a few short templates.
Example:
“Quick heads-up: [Project] is moving to [Next Step] by [Date]. Let me know if anything’s unclear.”
This keeps your brain (and your message) on track.
9. Re-Read It Like You’re in a Rush
Before sending, ask yourself:
- Can someone read this in 10 seconds and know what I mean?
- Is my request/action clearly stated?
- Is anything here just me overthinking?
Trim accordingly.
People are skimming. Help them win at skimming.
10. Remember: You’re Allowed to Take Up Space—Just Use It Wisely
Overexplaining can sometimes come from self-doubt. Like you have to justify everything. Or prove you’ve thought it through.
But you don’t need to write a thesis to sound smart. In fact, the smartest-sounding messages are usually the shortest.
Say what you mean. Trust people to get it. Let them come back with questions if they need more.
Clear is kind. And concise is cool.
So next time you find yourself typing a novel… stop. Hit delete. And start with: “Here’s the update.”
Chances are, that’s all you really needed.
